A couple months ago I faced the hard decision of choosing to return to Hawaii and continue doing ministry or starting a new adventure in Australia as an international nanny. Since the moment I left Hawaii last summer this decision weighed heavily on my heart. I had never intended to return to Hawaii. The plan was always to travel for the summer to be an au pair. So when a family from Melbourne, Australia had contacted me about coming for a few weeks in the summer to watch their three kids, I had no idea what to do.
For weeks I made pros and cons list, I sought out advice from anyone and everyone, and I prayed long and hard asking God to just give me a sense of direction. So how did I eventually come to the decision of Hawaii? On my first night back in Hawaii, Will asked me of the two places which one is going to feed into your life more. All along I weighed out opportunities of what I could do here versus what I could do there. In Australia I could travel and keep exploring the world, and in Hawaii I could go back and feel comfortable. Never had it crossed my mind to consider which place was going to encourage my life and my experience.
Hawaii is more than just a beautiful place to spend my summer, but it’s a place where I am growing in more ways than one. Investing myself in full-time ministry has taught me that ministry is right where God wants me to be. Being part of children’s lives and seeing Christ move in them is one of the most rewarding feelings I can experience. Receiving guidance and learning from a pastor whose name- Joy- embodies her personality gives me a vision of what I want my ministry to look like. In Hawaii, I’ve formed intentional relationships where I can lean on them and they can lean on me. So as I came to terms with my decision, I realized it was the right decision.
I was writing an email to the family in Australia, and as I typed out the words “Unfortunately I won’t be able to come this summer” my heart felt no pain. I typed those words out as if they were nothing, and I had no regrets. Then I thought about what it would feel like to text Lynn and say “Lynnie I’m sorry but I‘m not coming back this summer” and my heart broke. It nearly brought me to tears thinking about how difficult it would be to explain to the people who have so greatly impacted my life that I wouldn’t be returning.
So in a less than a week I have the amazing opportunity of returning to a place I love. I asked God to guide me as He always does. I asked God to reveal to me where He wants me to be. I asked Him to just take control of the situation. And so with a grateful and content heart, I choose Hawaii.