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I Have No Idea

Week One I heard plenty from God. Week Two maybe not so much, but there were still important themes throughout my day. Now it’s Week Three, and I have no idea.

I’m not hearing anything. I’m not feeling anything. I can’t really sense what God is trying to do. I know it’s good. I know He’s always working for my good. I know He’s doing something even when I least expect it. He always surprises me like that. But the need-to-know, control freak in me is dying to know what’s going on.

I guess I’ll just have to wait and see. Which of course, has never been my favorite thing to do.

But waiting to see what God is doing or going to do is a much better alternative than not waiting and trying to figure it out on my own. Because we all know I’m capable. We all know I’ve done that before. And every time, I mess it up. I take what God has so preciously crafted in my life, and I drive it into the ground. Shattered, trampled, broken. I ruin it. And all because I couldn’t wait so I had to take matters into my own hands.

Not this time though. I think God is trying to tell me that this one- whatever this one may be- is too valuable to break. Maybe that’s why He’s being very cautious about giving it to me. Because He wants me to be prepared to care for it. And maybe where I’m at right now isn’t the best place to care for the promise He’s trying to place in my life.

I have no idea.

But I think God is taking this time to remind me and to prepare me. Remind me what not to do. That the things I know in my head are the things I need to start acting out in real life. Knowing is vastly different from believing. And He wants me to believe. And then He’s preparing me. Etching away the unnecessary parts of my life. Weeding out the toxic parts that are trying to take root in my soul. He’s helping me be the best version of myself that I can be right now.

If anyone has any clue what God is trying to do in my life right now, please let me know. Because right now, I simply don’t know. I have absolutely no idea.

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