I can’t do this. Every time Chelsea tells me to take it down an inch and hold, I roll my eyes. I’m telling her in my head, “No Chelsea, no. I will not take it down an inch.” And then she has the nerve to tell me to step an arms distance away from the bar and hinge over like […]

The in between. Between suffering and rejoicing. I am constantly in a state of between suffering and rejoicing. At least that’s what it feels like. At least that’s the way it has been for the past few years. It hasn’t been rejoicing, rejoicing, rejoicing. I can’t tell you the last time I made it a full week without crying and […]

“Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord” There they were praising him. Shouting Hosanna. Fanning Him with their palm leaves. Celebrating Him for simply coming into town. Already they were in awe of Him. Amazed by the wonderous things He had done and accomplished. They loved Him for that. But little did they know of what […]

My head is pounding. My eyes are swollen. At least my nose isn’t stuffy because I was sitting up straight in the car instead of laying in bed. Right before I turned to get home I almost puked twice from crying so hard. But everything- from my body to my soul- hurts. Today took everything out of me. As I […]

I don’t often feel the need to cry anymore. Although I have cried twice this week. Three times if you include the tear up during therapy. I wouldn’t go so far as to say I’m doing great, maybe just ok. Surviving. Making it through as best as I can. Most days I just feel kind of numb to the emotion. […]